Happy Mother's Day!
I have a confession to make. Mother's Day feels like a day of happiness and sadness to me this year.
Happiness, because I'm so very thankful for my mom. It takes a special kind of woman to not just be a mom but a caregiver. I know I would most likely have succumbed to my illness years ago had it not been for her. She was the one who knew something was wrong, before anyone else, and fought for answers. She's sacrificed so much for me and I'm so thankful for that. She's faced so many battles and still remains gracious and loving. She's also a wonderful "grandma" to my fur kids, which leads me to the other reason I'm happy on Mother's Day. I may not have human children, but I have two of the most beautiful cat children in the world. Ariella and Toby bless my life on daily basis and it is an honor to be their "cat mom."
Yet, there's still a part of Mother's Day that hurts.
When you have a chronic illness, you feel left out of many things in life. I've felt especially isolated lately, which makes days like this even more difficult. It's even harder when you feel left behind in an area that you deeply desire for your life. For as long as I can remember, the deepest part of me has always wanted to be a wife and a mother. Other desires and interests would change, but that never wavered. More than that, I've felt like God put a calling on my heart for that, which makes it even more confusing. If that's His purpose for my life, why does it seem so impossible?
Then I think of Ruth, who traveled to a foreign land with her mother-in-law out of obedience, and I wonder if she thought her days as a wife were over, her chances to be a mother gone. I'm sure in some ways, it seemed impossible.
I think of Abraham and Sarah who thought it was so impossible to have children at their age that they tried to rush ahead of God. Yet God's plans still prevailed despite their impatience, and Issac was born in their old age.
So I remind myself today, that God is still able. God is still good. God will be good if He blesses me with my own family one day. God will be good if He does not. In the meantime, I thank Him for what I have now and pray if a family is in His ultimate Will for my life, He is preparing that road for me. I pray He molds my heart for the man I'm supposed to marry, and shapes his heart for me. I pray for wisdom and discernment in all things, and be faithful in the tasks in my life now.
I've read so many great devotions this week on Morher's Day, some I could relate to and some I could not, but the one below really touched my heart. It reminded me how blessed I was to have spent so many years investing in kids through children's ministry. I pray I'll get strong enough to do that again, and it will feel like an even bigger gift if I am ever strong enough to return! In the meantime, I am privileged to be an auntie to London and Paul and I pray that God will use me to positively influence their lives!
So ladies, no matter what you are facing today, whether you have children or not, know God can still use your maternal instincts- your wisdom, your compassion, your grace- to bless those around you and change the world for the better! I pray you feel blessed today, no matter what your circumstance.
A special Mother's Day devotion from Joni Eareckson Tada:
Mother's Day
"'Sing, O barren woman, you who never bore a child; burst into song, shout for joy, you who were never in labor; because more are the children of the desolate woman than of her who has a husband,' says the Lord."
Isaiah 54:1
For years my husband Ken and I tried to conceive a child. I knew of other spinal-cord-injured women who gave birth to children, and was convinced I could do the same. I planned to turn my art studio into a baby nursery, and my wheelchair into a "stroller." I could even envision holding my baby in a "kangaroo carrier" on my wheelchair. But it wasn't to be. After many tests at an infertility clinic, Ken and I realized we would not be able to have a child.
At first, I was devastated. But then we realized we already had a family. A worldwide family. We began to rejoice anew over the thousands of spiritual children -- especially children with disabilities -- that my story had touched over the years. Ken and I began to pray in a deeper, more specific way for these young people. Almost over night God took away the pain and emptiness of my barren womb. I almost plastered an Isaiah 54:1 bumper sticker on the back of my wheelchair!
There's a reason for every woman to celebrate Mother's Day -- even those who, like me, do not have children. Any woman, whether single or widowed, can enjoy rich relationships with boys and girls in their neighborhoods, churches, and extended family. If you have never given birth to a child, ask God to show you a young person whose life you can spiritually nurture -- it'll be a reason to "burst into song and shout for joy." Look up Child Evangelism Fellowship at www.cefonline.com to find ways you can share Christ with young people.
Lord God, I'm glad You take delight when we provide spiritual 'parenting' to children in our sphere of influence. Use me to bring more boys and girls into Your kingdom!
Blessings,
Joni and Friends
Pearls of Great Price
Copyright © 2006
by Joni Eareckson Tada
Published in print by Zondervan,
